focus(:

Friday, June 26, 2009

REST IN PEACE MICHEAL JACKSON.

10:36:00 PM

Monday, June 22, 2009

thai song..

i love this thai song!!

8:49:00 PM

Thursday, June 18, 2009

UBIN TRIP

love my team.

10:19:00 PM

Thursday, June 11, 2009

what 37 months? what 38 months? what diamond ring? my vision getting darker everyday.. I dunno is due to what overwork or am i going to get a glasses? My world came crashing down just like that.

For those who know me for very very long. you all do know that i am a hardworking. A no nonsense person who or when devoted to work. I will never stop. My dream to become a investigator to make the one person in my life proud which is HER. Now i can just forgo the dreams of being one.

I ever thought to myself, wedding is soon~~~ becoming happiest man in the world. The ring save up so much money just to get her. Confess in my blog on how bad i am previously.

Again and again, she tried, i tried, we tried. In the end of the whole episode, she left me standing all alone with hopes and dreams all crash. All i wish is for her to be right beside me. Tears were never every dry up. I can look strong on the outside but when comes to love, everyone is soft in the inside.

Good night to all my readers. I am going to have a long day tomorrow. Missing her always.

12:28:00 AM

my schedule for this week

Thursday 11 june inservice(half day), commander visit to Orchard(2nd half)
Friday 12 june morning shift
Saturday 13 june night shift
Sunday14 june 1st off
Monday 15 june(court case)
Tuesday 16 june(court case)
Wednesday 17 june(court case)
Thursday 18 june(court case)

where is my rest. i cant find time to do so. If you are the only one in my life and yet you dont understand how busy or how tired. Then I wont be able to find one who will be able to do so.

I MISS SHARON.

12:11:00 AM

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

I MISS SHARON CHIANG CHIN PEI!!

MY HEART IS VERY PAIN. IT SO HARD FOR ME TO LET YOU GO!

6:42:00 PM

tried to hide the feelings but somehow it showed. tears rolled down again and again whenever thoughts of her comes to my mind. Sitting all alone at home, wondering at this time will i be at her place sleeping with baby? cuddling her to sleep?

Miss those times when we ate mac for dinner or 147. miss the smell of smelly pillow. how i wish i had one of them beside me. I just miss her smell, her face, her hair and her heart. I dunno whether my heart for her will fade. 3 years relationship ask me to just put down like that i will not be able to.

Read StephSis blog and I know that she is enjoying her life without me. No quarrels nothing.

I just wished to say to you:

I MISS YOU. IF YOU ARE HAPPY WITH YOUR LIFE NOW, STAY ON LIKE THAT. I CANT PROVIDE YOU. I AM SORRY!

4:09:00 PM

i miss her. i do wish to call her now. wondering what is she doing for the day. But who am i now to ask her. I dun even exist now in her life. I believe she is feeling so happy today without me even bothering her.

Already sign up for the school, already had one piece of work finish. working in the goverment service aint easy as what she think it is. Tomorrow had to see DPP(deputy public prosecutor) for a case at 11.30am by the time i reach home is 1 plus. I have to come back at night to my work place to finish my notice board. All this is on my first off which is today, btw i am still working.

The next day i have inservice full day. Where is my rest? does she know all these? all she know is that i need to accompany her. How to rest?? how!!

For those who think that i had done wrong. I dare u to tag me! If you think my job is simple try it. But i bet you cant do better. So shut ur farking comments to yourself aite!

5:28:00 AM

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

am i missing her already? why are my tears dropping whenever i am looking at her pictures? I dont even know what i can do to save this relationship from falling apart? I am a Joker yet i cant smile? lots of question running through my head..

I dont know what to do!

11:16:00 AM

love always have some twist and turns. Whether it will twist and turn to be good or bad.. its hard to tell. My love life have always been twisting and turning to the max. We had our good times and our bad times. Loving her was the biggest achievement i have made. Though its hard to accept the time when we quarrel over something very small.

I have to admit what she really wants, I cant give it to her. Like for example time. I really wish that i could have 36 hours in a day to sort out between work and her and for my body to have a rest. I could not accompany her.

If one day i have to let you go because of my work, then I will let you go. You will never understand the extreme stress of work as you are not in my shoes. I love the stress, its something that is priceless. I need rest, you dun understand. Its alright, I will never ever quarrel with you anymore.

You choose to go, I choose to accept.

10:53:00 AM

Sunday, June 7, 2009

tomorrow schedule

0430- 0500 - get ready for jog
0500- 0515 - reach work
0520- 0600 - jog from npc to tanglin road and back to npc
0615- 0700 - bath and get ready for work
0800- 2100 - work work
2100- 2200 - gym
2210- 2220 - bath
2230 - 2300- reach home
0000- sleep

Gym session includes
100 crunches
10 push up
2 sets of 8 on every machine

No more late night slack. Every morning shift this is my schedule. No more oily food. Bread and more bread. I going to be fit. trust me.

9:46:00 PM

Yesterday, came home after sleeping at baby crib.. Hmm after that slack a while and then fell asleep. Went out at 8.50pm, cab down to FEP to meet baby to pick her home. After picking her up, bus-ed back to baby crib and went to 147 to buy supper. Baby and me bought sweet and sour chicken rice. So ya, ate our supper and talk for a while took some photos with baby phone. I miss her. I love her. 37 months and counting...

love this 36 months picture, cause i propose to her.

simply love my baby.

chasing the storms, awaiting the rainbows.

11:00:00 AM

Friday, June 5, 2009

love this song

3:18:00 PM

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

UPdates

well.. busy schedule of mine have just past.. i just want to say sorry to my baby for making her upset these few days over some little things. baby i am sorry. i just want to tell you that i love you.

I have not been meeting stephmei and cwxbro for a some time already. Been really busy with work and gosh I had no even time for myself. Hmm. Been also thinking that life has not been achieved to the max.. I am feeling happy as i got a gf, a family and a career. But i feel that my life have not reach the max of what or where i want to be.

I feel weird. does anyone out there have the same feelings like me? I wish some of you could tell me that i am weird. hahas.

School starting for me in July. which means lesser time for baby.. I am going to study real hard for school and i want to make it to university to have a degree. My path aint a Junior officer, my path is a senior officer. I am going to make it big.

work and school aside. I am also into shirt makings these days.. Going to start a small small label company, will be flying to indonesia to check it out, I am still in my planning processes. Hope that it will be a another achievement for me!

10:20:00 AM

photographer !

name: Fajariansyah
age: 23
bdae: 09/09/1986
love: babysharon

favourites !

photography
dancing
sports
travelling
food

wishes !

LOVE
~~engaged with babysharon~~
marriage with babysharon
be with babysharon forever
honeymoon with babysharon to AUSTRALIA

PERSONAL
~~blackberry storm hp or E71~~
~~DSLR camera Canon 450D/Canon 50D~~
new laptop

OUTING
fcuk watch(outing)
~~fred perry polo tee~~
onitsuka tiger shoes
vans shoes
~~crocs shoes~~
burberry top
burberry wallet
more levis jeans
~~nike haversack~~

runaways !